the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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