No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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