Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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