So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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