Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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