My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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