in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
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