Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
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