Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
