Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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