They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
you told grandpa to call you daddy
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
A bitchslap is in order.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
