Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
