i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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