so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
