batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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