it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You were trust falling into bushes
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
