Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
