No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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