The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize