She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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