We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize