I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
