One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
