also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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