I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
