i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
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