Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize