11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
This baby is an asshole
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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