Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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