That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize