Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories