Are we in a gay sports bar?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
