And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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