Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
my liver is dry heaving
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
