The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
