I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize
