pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.