Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML

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  (202): i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML http://tfl.nu/7ngy
  Replies (4) Good night (1311) Bad night (631)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.

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  (314): I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster. http://tfl.nu/3vkx
  Replies (22) Good night (4369) Bad night (687)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there

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  (443): party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there http://tfl.nu/5lco
  Replies (10) Good night (790) Bad night (3374)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks

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  (320): Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks http://tfl.nu/7398
  Replies (64) Good night (1539) Bad night (6575)
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  (949): View more from California

  im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume

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  (949): im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume http://tfl.nu/ixw0
  Replies (27) Good night (1333) Bad night (4272)
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  (408): View more from California

  I don't have enough holes for all these australians

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  (408): I don't have enough holes for all these australians http://tfl.nu/dq24
  Replies (13) Good night (6079) Bad night (1471)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.

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  (203): This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning. http://tfl.nu/sy0s
  Replies (23) Good night (1541) Bad night (3662)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.

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  (248): Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it. http://tfl.nu/o1jt
  Replies (8) Good night (4126) Bad night (1312)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast

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  (202): I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast http://tfl.nu/11fz
  Replies (13) Good night (2083) Bad night (1273)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.

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  (850): It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons. http://tfl.nu/qh0d
  Replies (8) Good night (966) Bad night (2612)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men

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  (503): At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men http://tfl.nu/ey0x
  Replies (2) Good night (485) Bad night (388)
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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka

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  (515): Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka http://tfl.nu/yw8u
  Replies (1) Good night (676) Bad night (325)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  did you know we used to have a pool?

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  (306): mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived (306): did you know we used to have a pool? http://tfl.nu/0ssr
  Replies (0) Good night (416) Bad night (630)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?

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  (256): We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break? http://tfl.nu/kbd5
  Replies (1) Good night (623) Bad night (378)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?

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  (469): Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush? http://tfl.nu/eg9u
  Replies (2) Good night (563) Bad night (307)

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