I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
