her vagine was all disorganized.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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