good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
