The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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