I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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