the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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