If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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