Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
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