Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
