well you can't waste a boner
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Found your dick twin last night
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
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