Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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