We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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