Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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